Anniversary
by hobbleit
Summary: It's been a year


**A/N:Hello, there. This is my first ever Torchwood fic so please be gentle. This sort of thing has probably been done a million times but the story just wouldn't leave me. I should probably be updating my Chryed fic, which will be done eventually... Once I think of stuff to write.**

**Title:** Anniversary

**Rating:** PG-13

**Pairing:** Jack/Ianto (implied not explicit)

**Genre:** Angst/Comfort

**Warnings:** mild swearing.

**Summary:** It's been a year

**Disclaimer:** Torchwood does not belong to me, I just like playing around. No copyright infringement intended.

"You can take your coffee and stick it up your arse," Jack groaned as he heard Ianto's voice across the Hub followed by the crashing sound of a mug hitting the wall. He knew today would be a bad day and wondered what Owen had said. He left his office just in time to see Ianto storm out of the Hub leaving an angry looking Owen and a confused looking Gwen.

"What's going on?" Jack called out.

Gwen replied, "I have no idea. Owen was being a bit of an arse though."

"What did I do?" Owen protested. "I didn't do anything, he just took a strop because he's a mardy git."

"You were being your usual self, a bit of an arse."

"Okay, stop bickering. What did you say to him, Owen?" Jack rubbed his forehead, willing the impending headache to go away.

"I didn't say anything different from usual, he just seriously over-reacted at it and stormed off."

"Owen, do you know what day it is?"

"Of course I know what day it is, it's… oh," he stopped himself as the realisation hit him. "I'm an idiot," he groaned.

"Yeah," Jack agreed.

"Sorry," Gwen interrupted, "but what is today?"

XXX

Tosh wasn't surprised to see Ianto sitting in the Tourist Office. He was staring into space, a blank look on his face but his eyes betrayed his sadness.

"Morning," she greeted.

"Tosh," Ianto replied, slightly surprised to be drawn out of his reverie. "You're late this morning," he said trying to start a normal conversation.

"I was at the dentist."

"You have my sympathies," Ianto dryly said as he opened the door leading to the Hub for her.

Tosh smiled gently and rested her hand on his shoulder. She understood. She didn't even need to say a word. Ianto nodded in thanks before she headed down to the Hub.

Ianto couldn't believe it had been a year since his life had changed so drastically. It had started off as such an ordinary day, even the ghosts had become part of everyday life. He hadn't expected what had happened to happen that day.

He remembered the buzz that had rippled through the building when the Doctor had appeared. He was the entire reason Torchwood had been brought into existence. People wanted to leave their respective offices to try and catch a glimpse of the elusive man. The excitement had quickly turned to terror as the day descended into death and violence. Cybermen had appeared and started to convert the staff of Torchwood One. Then Daleks appeared and the annihilation really began.

Ianto still had no idea how he managed to survive when so many others had died. Only 27 people had survived the attack. Jack always called it The Battle of canary Wharf but Ianto didn't agree. Battle implied fighting when in reality it had been a massacre. They couldn't fight back, the Cybermen and Dalek's had been too powerful and strong against them all. It was either hide or die. Ianto had chosen the former.

The aftermath had turned into a haze for Ianto. All he could focus on was helping Lisa and, although there had been a constant reminder of what had happened at Canary Wharf, it all faded into the background in his desperation to save her from her half converted state.

"You okay?" He heard a voice and he nearly jumped in the air. He'd been so lost in his own thoughts he hadn't noticed Jack emerge.

"I'm fine," Ianto replied.

"It wouldn't be a bed thing if you weren't. Especially today of all days."

Ianto didn't know how to respond. He wanted to tell Jack that everything was okay, that he wasn't on the verge of falling apart but the words couldn't reach his mouth. Jack spotted the distress on Ianto's face and pulled him into a hug. Ianto melted into Jack's arms and began to sob. Jack tightened his grip on the younger man and rubbed gentle circles into his back until he began to calm down.

"You can talk to me if you want," Jack offered but Ianto shook his head.

"I'll be fine."

"Do you want to go home?"

"Funnily enough, I don't really want to be on my own."

"You want some company, then?"

"Wouldn't say no."

Ianto became silent after that, lost in his thoughts. After a while he spoke quietly, so quiet Jack almost didn't hear what he said.

"Everyone I knew died," he whispered.

"I know."

"I looked at the list of the dead after…" His voice faltered. "After and everyone I worked with was on there," fresh tears began to fall. "But at the time it didn't really register because all I could think of was helping Lisa. It was only after that everything hit me." Jack didn't speak, he just stood there silently and allowed Ianto to talk out all of his feelings. "And now it's been a year, a whole year. Why did I live and so many other people die?"

"I don't know. I can't give you any answers for that," Jack answered, his voice hoarse.

"There were times when I wish I had died," Ianto admitted. "When I didn't want to go on… especially after Lisa died. I thought it would have been so much easier because everything hurt so much."

"And now?"

"It's mostly easier now. It's just on days like today that it really gets to me."

Jack wrapped his arm around Ianto's shoulder and pulled him close once more, kissing his temple softly. "You can always talk to me, you know that?"

"I know," Ianto replied. "Thank you, sir."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"I'd just like to get back to work, it's helping to keep my mind off things."

"Okay," Jack smiled. "I gave Owen hell by the way. He shouldn't have said what he did."

"I know," Ianto said as he followed jack back down to the Hub. "He just acts like an insensitive prick on occasions."

XXX

Gwen smiled sympathetically at Ianto on his return and he knew that the others had told her everything. She walked up to him and gave him a gentle hug. "If there's anything I can do just ask."

"Thank you," Ianto replied, "but I'm okay."

"Listen, uh, I'm sorry mate," Owen said by way of an apology. "I wasn't thinking," Ianto simply nodded his head in acceptance.

"Right then, now we've got apologies out of the way, how about we get on with some work," Jack announced.

"Would you like some coffee, sir?"

"That'd be great," Jack replied and rested his hand on Ianto's shoulder for a moment. "Remember, any time you need to talk."

"Thank you, sir, I know," Ianto smiled gently.


End file.
